How are you?
Most people have all these mixed emotions in common but yet try to hide from them, and hide them from other people and appear ‘normal’ and unaffected and when people ask them: “How are you?” they give the reflex default answer of: “I’m fine thanks and you?” or maybe: “I’m good”. Sometimes it’s true, at that moment you may be feeling good, but it has become a reflex question and reflex answer, a mere acknowledgement of each other’s presence. The real question is asking about your state of heart, mind and soul, your emotional well-being, or the frequency of your consciousness. Often there’s not enough time to really discuss one’s real emotional state, but if you really think about it, it is not a question of time, because people find the time to do and talk about many things that interest them but very few people actually want to know how you really are or even have the time and capacity to listen to what’s going on in your life and feel these emotions with you without becoming awkward and disturbed.
We carry it all around anyways, whether we remember or not, whether we acknowledge it or not, whether we discuss it or not, it is with us, all these mixed up feelings and emotions, as some vague nebulous stress that sometimes erupts in emotional implosions or explosions and in cases of chronic suppression it will come to consciousness through life experiences. Life, God, the Universe doesn’t want us to remain in this state and so always finds a way to awaken us to what we have forgotten or are hiding. In the case of chronic repression it will surface eventually as physical symptoms and illness, which usually gets people to take notice and start making changes. But why wait and waste your life and precious time stuck in negative patterns?
There are three kinds of people. Those who are angry, sad or depressed or locked in some combination of negative dispositions, then there are those who are happy because things are going their way, according to plan, but… if something goes wrong then they are very prone to slipping into some or the other negative state like anger, fear, or grief. Then there are those rare individuals who are able to sustain a happy even blissful consciousness during good times and bad, even when everything seems to be going wrong, or their world gets turned upside down, they somehow keep it together and stay positive and don’t fall into unconscious reactivity.
The majority of us fall into one of the first two categories so you shouldn’t feel bad about recognizing or admitting to these so called negative surface emotions which seem to get a hold of us from time to time. It is good and necessary. These feelings and emotions are trying to tell you something about yourself and your life. Your body and psyche are designed this way and by becoming aware and conscious of these you can begin to use your emotional guidance system properly. But if not you will add another layer to it, you will feel bad about feeling bad, and so forth and so forth. But there is a way to be truly happy and we will explore that together as we go along, but first let us look a little more closely at these surface level emotions and what they are telling us.
Lets start with Anger, which is one of the primal raw emotion that is most misunderstood and poorly utilized.