Afro, Music, Studio

Hleziphi at Jazzworx

 

In studio, recording drums, bass and vocals with Hlezi, Walied, Bongz, Musa, MrMo, and TCReal – what a day! A dream come true! Soooo exciting, and so fulfilling! This is just a sneak peak… a taste of beautiful things to come. First three tracks off Hlezi’s debut album “Buhle”, “A thousand miles”, and “To be loved by You”

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Freedom, Healing, Individuation, Psychology

Active Imagination

 

 

With Anja van Kralingen

At the Centre for Applied Jungian Studies, Jhb, South Africa

I have always been intrigued with Carl Jung’s psychology but over the past few years I found myself drawn deeper into his work, as I found explanations for things that have always perplexed me, about myself and other people, and coming to the core or essence, I realised that I needed to get a grip on what Individuation is. I made this commitment to myself and literally the next day a friend posted on Facebook about this course called the “The 12-Step Individuation Program”.

I read through the ad and it was perfect! I loved the way they described Individuation. I could tell that these people really know Jung, and know what they are talking about, and most importantly, the name of their website and centre is “Applied Jung” with the emphasis and focus on applying what you learn about Individuation to your life, not to just talk about it, or read about it, but to learn skills and develop tools, to actually Individuate, to really expand your consciousness and your vision about who you really are!

One of the most fascinating things I discovered is that the Unconscious is alot more accessible than I thought, and that it is constantly communicating with us through dreams, imaginations, and the synchronicities and experiences of our lives, to tap into those aspects of ourselves that have been repressed, unlived, distorted and twisted, and to energise these dormant lost parts of ourselves to find out who am I apart from who everyone wants me to be, and what everyone expects of me?

What do I want? Where do I want to be? What is most important to me?

Live Music

“Slide” by WaJa

 

 

I feel my spirit stirring deep inside
It opens up my mind and heart so wide
But everything that I have tried
Makes me feel like I’ve been taken for a ride
I feel like I’ve been taken for a riiiide

The past and the future collide
Lost inside the moment i decide
While racing rats do seek and hide
I’ll just close my eyes and slide
I’ll just close my eyes and sliiiiide…

I12BF3

“Let it Go”

Lessons from Disney’s “Let it Go”

“Let it go, let it go. Can’t hold it back anymore…”

Is about releasing what has been repressed and kept hidden. Its not about ‘forgive and forget’ and It’s not about continuing the pretense and status quo. You can’t keep up the sham forever; the truth inside you, the truth of who you really are, is a power and a pressure and the more you deny it the more it wants to burst forth!!!

“Be the good girl you always had to be. Conceal don’t feel, don’t let them know, but now they know.”

How do we heal the rift or fragmentation that happens to us somewhere between ‘what they think’ VS ‘what I feel’ or ‘what I have to hide in order to fit in and not upset others’ VS ‘what I feel inside and the gifts that I have’. It’s about showing who you really are. We cannot accomplish that by hanging onto and trying to please everyone and our tormentors and abusers. You have to create space for yourself to know who you are, apart from all those negative limiting influences. Elsa felt the tantalizing release of all that was locked away, and it was the first step in her healing and individuation process, but she still had to find a way to bring it back into relationship with others.


“Only an act of true love can thaw a frozen heart!”

You can’t beat darkness with more of the same or similar. The game changer is true love. But love has many faces and is shown in many ways. It is not just ‘forgiving and forgetting’ holding hands and kissy kissy huggy huggy… it usually involves sacrifice. That is the test of true love, what you are willing to sacrifice for the one you love.

What are you trying to say?

What I am trying to say is that each of us (some more than others) drags around the past all the time every day. It lives a deep life in us and through us in the present and disguises itself as our ‘personality’ or personas, the roles we act out in the games we play. The process of dismantling it is long and arduous and it involves decoding its programming in one’s mind, reclaiming and reintegrating lost parts of one’s psyche, learning to express rather than repress and gradually breaking the chains attached to one’s heart.
Has anyone ever ‘let go’ of the past simply by willing it, patching it, hiding or running from it. Releasing the past is hard work and it’s unpleasant to say the least. It is repressed after all becos it is the very thing you wanted to avoid and could not face when you were younger. But it is what we are here to do. It may well be all that we are really here to do… But instead we will seek distraction and entertainment and hide behind our defense mechanisms and stratagems but life will force us to face it someday, sooner or later it will surface, inevitably, and when it does, only those who are or have been willing to face it and grow and change will come out of it alive. And by alive I don’t mean walking talking eating breathing, I mean really alive… living life and really feeling and knowing and being and loving. Those who resisted, fought, repressed, and built up elaborate defenses and barriers against it, will have their world shattered and they will have themselves plunged into the abysmal nightmare.

Abuse, Family, I12BF3, Relationship

The Abuser

Are you loved… or are you feared?”

Surprisingly many people cannot tell the difference. They somehow mistake fear for love. So let me rather ask:

Do you want to be feared… or loved?”

Abusers have many methods and techniques of controlling the dependent people in their lives. They use ridicule, humiliation, and verbal, emotional and physical violence to get what they want, to have their way, or just to vent their frustrations, but they also enjoy the power, they get a kick out of it, a thrill, a high, and they crave that mixed feeling of superiority, control, being feared… basically power. They have no feeling sense for the other person, the victim of their assault or tirade, be it their child, or sibling, or parent, or colleague or whoever, and they have no conscience, or the inner guide which alerts them when they have transgressed someone’s rights or done something wrong. No outer guide either because everyone around them is so afraid of them… someone may speak out sometime, but they see this merely as a rebellion that needs to be squashed. Anyone who challenges them is inherently wrong, and needs to be broken down, that is the form of their moral code.

Because they have built up elaborate walls of fear and distrust between them and those who are closest to them, they have to maintain what looks like the very solid invincible persona of the infallible power, but actually it is frail and fragile, it is the essence of weakness masquerading as strength or power. Incapable of real, sincerity and empathy, they are incapable of the vulnerability that love requires, but they also want to be loved so they compensate by doing other things, buying things, helping people, and this gives them something like a feeling of being needed and appreciated, and… loved. They are happy that they can speak one of the love ‘languages’, even though it is the lowest and most selfish… giving to receive. Outwardly with other people in certain circles, outside the home, they appear to be very pleasant, friendly, fun, funny… they can be very highly respected and well thought of by friends, extended family and colleagues, but the people closest to them see a very different side to them.

Like all these dictators who rise to power by cunning and aggressive methods and techniques, the household abuser makes everyone afraid of them and no one rebels because the abuser/dictator has the power to punish, and the abuser will use whatever means necessary to maintain their position, their hegemony. How do they become this way? They observe and experience their own parent’s pathology, and they imbibe those energies and energetic complexes and then they continue to operate the installed program independently autonomously.

The parent’s abusive behavior may or may not have been directed at the individual, they may have been abused themselves or the experience may have consisted primarily of witnessing or observing the routine, ritual, chronic abuse of the other parent or sibling. The person internalized it and accepted the patterning into their own framework and identity, and continued playing out the same or similar kinds of abuses and patterns of abuse on the dependent people around them, the one’s lower down than them in the power hierarchy who they could control and manipulate and break down to be subordinate. Usually the very same parent and sibling, but also often the abusive parent as they grow older will get some of their own medicine back from the abuser they created. And the two will probably continue their patterning onto the next… the third generation, and so it goes, on and on and on and on… until a conscious one comes along and ends the cycle.

Music

Face your fears!

I stood there not sure what to do next. My lead vocalist just left the stage in a puddle of tears half way into our set, the rest of the band were very late, had not arrived yet, and the audience of some thirty work colleagues were looking at me expectantly… trying to look cool, but my heart is thumping, hands sweating… what to do?

WaJa-guitar_WJ_0015

As an aspiring musician I have always been held back by a debilitating shyness, or when it comes to performance then I guess it’s called acute stage fright. My heart starts racing and pounding, my hands and fingers start shaking, and my breath becomes erratic, and it’s quite obvious that there is no way I can play the guitar and sing my song. So I tended to be a private musician, playing for my own creative expression.

I remember a really disastrous experience once when there was a teaching meeting and they asked me to prepare some music, and I had been working on a really cool new song, and when they called me up I came to the centre of the large room, surrounded by people… I thought ok this is the moment, when I shine. But instead I sucked! I stumbled, fumbled and mumbled my way thru the song and when I finished there was complete and utterly awkward silence. I wished that couch could have swallowed me whole. I must have sounded terrible! Those kind of experiences don’t help at all. Looking back i should have prepared a sing-a-long, but oh well, so much for hindsight.

What did help was joining a band. A friend invited me to join a choir he was starting, and this was a great experience, besides making friends and having fun making religious music, i had to also up my game, and improve technically which meant practise and composure… also i got exposure to live performance in a situation with backing music and many vocalists and so the guitar was not prominent so I could kind of disappear in the background and that suited me just fine. I also didn’t have to worry about making mistakes as they weren’t so noticeable. Sometime later I made a friend at work who sings and we started writing songs together, beautiful simple poetic songs, we just clicked from the word go. Eventually formed a band, with drums, bass and keys, and I found that in the band even though the songs were acoustic guitar driven and i had to be on point, the spotlight was not on me, it was on the lead vocalist, and so I could relax, compose myself and get into it, and enjoy the music, and the stage fright was disappearing with every gig. I still used to get very nervous, and still had shaky hands int he beginning but it cleared up. Essentially as a musician you want to communicate freedom to people not inhibition and fear.

But now, here I was at this work function, standing on stage with my guitar, silence… except for the mic making those feedback squeals, everyone looking at me. We were doing a very emotional song that she wrote for her brother who passed away, and half way thru she broke down crying, and someone took her to another room to recover herself. Note to self: don’t do that song again. I could take a seat and wait for her, but… I don’t know what came over me, really out of character, but I came up to the mic and I… played and I sang my song.

“I don’t ever want to be, lost here without You. I don’t ever want to feel, lost here without You. La la lala laa laa laa… I don’t ever wanna beeeee… Stuck inside a memoryyyy. I don’t ever wanna feeeeel. Lost inside a fantasyyyy, yeaaaah yeah!”

And I was good, they loved it. It felt amazing! Sitting here reminiscing about it I remembered that ‘Art of Living’ seminar which I gate crashed a few months before. I told them about my music and my fear and with help I set myself a challenge to play my music for an audience and the target was within six months. I didn’t think it was gonna happen, and I had completely forgotten about that, but quite unexpectedly, almost six months later… it happened… I did it!

play guit jazzy learn

Live Music

“Everything” by Rara

I’m knocking on your door, I’m not afraid anymore,

I could be anything, that you want me to be,

but i’m hoping that i’m already, your everything…”

To hear more of Raras music you can listen to her debut album “Rapture” and even download tracks off the album off Soundcloud. Just click on [BF3Records] button above… Enjoy!!!

Let us know what you think 🙂

Peace

children, Healing, Live Music

Songs of a Soul

 

 

Recently i have been going around with my video camera interviewing inspiring people, people who really are doing interesting, amazing things, but more especially who have that twinkle in the eye and the warm natural smile, people who are sources of inspiration to others and so… i have been following Zain Bhikha’s travels around South Africa and reading the comments and I felt it would be nice to have a chat and share with more people. Someone who goes around spreading good vibrations and positive ideas to the youth is doing the most important work!

I have always loved uplifting music and have enjoyed Zain’s heartfelt beautiful sincere songs, i think it was the song “Our World” (the whole album actually) that  really captured my heart and imagination. I cried the first time i listened to that song, and several times after that… it comes from a very deep place.

 

“Every morning on every news flash,
I hear the sorrow of the world
It seems like everybody’s lost and scared
trying to make sense of it all
And as I travel to and from,
so many faces pass me by
I see lonely hearts living lonely lives
just biding their time,

And while we call ourselves civilised,
many people living empty lives,
As they drone their way through day and night”

 

For someone like me struggling to find my way in faith and music, his was a harmonizing voice in the world’s of faith and music. The music speaks for itself but there is value in hearing from the artist and getting to know them a little better and so I requested an interview and Zain and his team were very kind and accommodating to squeeze me in to a very tight schedule. It was very cool to attend his last show in Johannesburg before heading off to the UK leg of the tour.

The new CD and DVD are amazing, we are really loving it. My two and a half year old daughter, Jasmine’s favourite is “Mum is amazing” we listen to it over and over and watch the music video over and over… she is even learning the words. My wife, Varkha’s favourite is “Someday” (Salaam’un salaam). My fav is still Our World but there is a part in “Mount Hira” that for me is one of those magical moments in world musical history, where he sings:

 

“…And in the sky, was angel Jibra’il
He said O Muhammad, O Rasulu’llah…”

 

My heart skips a beat every time. The songs are having a positive effect on our lives and making us think about our role as parents, and basically just being inspired to be more patient, more positive and happier.

So thank you, Zain,

We wish you all the beautiful things of this world and the hereafter!

Salaam

I12BF3

‘Ur Special’ by SoulfulDrumKid

Bongani Mthimkulu

Another great musician for whom i have a tremendous amount of respect, Bongs and I became friends by one of the serendipitous meetings, we had a youth conference gig in Durban and our drummer bailed on us at the last minute and to ‘make up for it’ he gave me the number of another drummer who was ‘even better’ he gave me Bongani’s number. Unfortunately Bongani couldn’t help us out either on that one, well he wanted to but his manager refused, but he phoned me later and spoke with real sincerity thats very rare he said he liked my manner of speaking and dealing and wanted us to be friends 🙂

And so thats how it started, we began working on music together, we bought a drumkit, started jamming with different artists, recording in our own studio, playing gigs and events, just having fun, and i grew to admire him as an artist and as a wise and soulful kid, drum kid… mad skills on the drums, keys, guitar, any instrument he can pick up… and also in production, it was an honor and learning experience for me to watch him put together “Bambelela” his debut album, house or soulful house, but with diverse flavours and influences and such talented people that he featured – one of my favourite albums of all time!

One day we went to the lake with some friends, guitars and hookas and we jammed some tunes and just had a fun, free, happy afternoon and after the sun went down we went back to the studio and he was deeply in some songwriting mode, the spirit was moving in him… he was downloading something big… i had never seen anyone write such beautiful and powerful, yet simple and catchy lyrics, and when he was done he disappeared into the studio and only emerged the next morning… “U Special” was born that night… its one of my fav songs, and i turn to it to lift my spirits and it never fails. Thanks to this song i really do feel special and beautiful!

Throughout the time i have known him he has always been playing for and serving the church and he continues to do so. His love for Christ is inspiring and the light in his eyes and the magic in his fingers makes me believe that Christ consciousness fills his heart to the point of outpouring. I remember the first time he came home and met my family he just amazed me with his confidence, care, and genuine warmth, and won everyone over – there were no racial barriers at all – he really connected with my mom. He’s a super cool guy, and one of my best friends. It was a pleasure to spend a fun day with him just tagging along, a day in the life of… SDK. I hope you enjoy it!

Peace

WaJa