Lessons from Disney’s “Let it Go”
“Let it go, let it go. Can’t hold it back anymore…”
Is about releasing what has been repressed and kept hidden. Its not about ‘forgive and forget’ and It’s not about continuing the pretense and status quo. You can’t keep up the sham forever; the truth inside you, the truth of who you really are, is a power and a pressure and the more you deny it the more it wants to burst forth!!!
“Be the good girl you always had to be. Conceal don’t feel, don’t let them know, but now they know.”
How do we heal the rift or fragmentation that happens to us somewhere between ‘what they think’ VS ‘what I feel’ or ‘what I have to hide in order to fit in and not upset others’ VS ‘what I feel inside and the gifts that I have’. It’s about showing who you really are. We cannot accomplish that by hanging onto and trying to please everyone and our tormentors and abusers. You have to create space for yourself to know who you are, apart from all those negative limiting influences. Elsa felt the tantalizing release of all that was locked away, and it was the first step in her healing and individuation process, but she still had to find a way to bring it back into relationship with others.
You can’t beat darkness with more of the same or similar. The game changer is true love. But love has many faces and is shown in many ways. It is not just ‘forgiving and forgetting’ holding hands and kissy kissy huggy huggy… it usually involves sacrifice. That is the test of true love, what you are willing to sacrifice for the one you love.
What are you trying to say?
What I am trying to say is that each of us (some more than others) drags around the past all the time every day. It lives a deep life in us and through us in the present and disguises itself as our ‘personality’ or personas, the roles we act out in the games we play. The process of dismantling it is long and arduous and it involves decoding its programming in one’s mind, reclaiming and reintegrating lost parts of one’s psyche, learning to express rather than repress and gradually breaking the chains attached to one’s heart.
Has anyone ever ‘let go’ of the past simply by willing it, patching it, hiding or running from it. Releasing the past is hard work and it’s unpleasant to say the least. It is repressed after all becos it is the very thing you wanted to avoid and could not face when you were younger. But it is what we are here to do. It may well be all that we are really here to do… But instead we will seek distraction and entertainment and hide behind our defense mechanisms and stratagems but life will force us to face it someday, sooner or later it will surface, inevitably, and when it does, only those who are or have been willing to face it and grow and change will come out of it alive. And by alive I don’t mean walking talking eating breathing, I mean really alive… living life and really feeling and knowing and being and loving. Those who resisted, fought, repressed, and built up elaborate defenses and barriers against it, will have their world shattered and they will have themselves plunged into the abysmal nightmare.